"When two people seek to understand each other, they build bridges of meaning. One person’s rope reaches out and ties up with the other person’s cable, and even while materially different, even while coming from different places, a link is formed. When we ask questions, when we listen, when we quietly absorb, when we seek to understand, when we empathize, we are showing people the highest love and most ultimate respect. A precursor, of course, to any budding courtship."
I don’t claim to be any kind of dating coach, but I do have some observations that perhaps you could either relate to (or learn from!).... and basically my number one PSA is: The mere act of expressing interest does not make someone interesting. ... And I don’t go out with people who have not interested me.
I hate the question: “What are you looking for?” I also hate any derivative of: “Hang in there, you will find him." Because surprise surprise, I am not looking for a man. I’m not looking for ANY one...
I find myself reflecting, once in a blue moon, about how I’ve been largely single these last five years and what that has been like: half a decade making meals for one, without regular physical intimacy, holidays spent without a special someone, trips and photographs taken alone... And I’m wistful for a moment, because I want these things. I enjoy building a life with someone. Waking up together in the morning. Flirting, teasing, trusting. Loving and investing, with my whole heart. And then I remember...
2020 is not what I expected or planned for, and it's been uncomfortable and demoralizing in a lot of ways, but I take this approach: I take stock of all my blessings and accomplishments. Are you doing the same?
Christmas: whether one is single or in a couple, whether traveling to family or vice versa; typically, it’s a holiday one spends with loved ones. But this year, my Christmas looks a little different. And I love the flexibility and freedom.
When I’m asked the dreaded question: “How old are you?”, these thoughts ping-pong through my brain in an exhaustive sequence...
If never marry, so be it. Don’t feel sorry for me. My life has begun, and it's full of possibilities.
Rejection is a fact of life, and it’s happened over and over to all of us, including me.
I'm two months from my 34th birthday and I just realized I spent pretty much the entire length of my 30s stone-cold single.