I’ve been a nomad for over two years now, traveling the world and dating, and this is what I’ve found… · I meet more viable men while traveling abroad, compared to when I lived in one place or traveled full-time in the U.S. · Even with the capability to screen/filter, I meet more men I’m actually interested in in-real-life, vs. on dating apps · Even though I’m currently single, the fleeting connections I’ve experienced this year give me hope that I’ll find my future long-term partner out there in the world But a thriving dating life means I’ve also met some busters (in the wise words of TLC). From the (relatively) benign to the bad, these are the three types of “busters” I keep encountering over and over again on the nomad life...
11 years ago, I traveled to Greece for the first time. It had been a few years since my verbally abusive relationship ended; but during that trip, I felt like I had finally healed and was ready to date again. I was also in my mid 20s, and starting to feel the pressures from society. When would I get engaged? Would I hit the milestones I was supposed to in the right time frame? Were we dating in vain, or was my partner going to propose? Now, in my mid-30s, my outlook on marriage and relationships has completely changed. I believe some people are only meant to stay in your life for a season, and that longevity is not the primary goal. I also discuss the sunk cost fallacy. Read on...
I've been traveling solo full-time since September 2020, moving from place to place every few weeks. And sure, I travel alone, but I'm not usually alone! So how do I end up making friends while on the road? These are my top six friend-finding tactics.
I’ve been at the nomad life for over one year in the U.S., and it suits me. It does! But I’ve made a point to be honest with you guys. I see people on the web glamorizing this life. And it’s not for everyone. I think it’s important to have as many facts as you can, and be honest with yourself. Here are some truths you need to face if you want to be a nomad...
"When two people seek to understand each other, they build bridges of meaning. One person’s rope reaches out and ties up with the other person’s cable, and even while materially different, even while coming from different places, a link is formed. When we ask questions, when we listen, when we quietly absorb, when we seek to understand, when we empathize, we are showing people the highest love and most ultimate respect. A precursor, of course, to any budding courtship."
I don’t claim to be any kind of dating coach, but I do have some observations that perhaps you could either relate to (or learn from!).... and basically my number one PSA is: The mere act of expressing interest does not make someone interesting. ... And I don’t go out with people who have not interested me.
I hate the question: “What are you looking for?” I also hate any derivative of: “Hang in there, you will find him." Because surprise surprise, I am not looking for a man. I’m not looking for ANY one...
I find myself reflecting, once in a blue moon, about how I’ve been largely single these last five years and what that has been like: half a decade making meals for one, without regular physical intimacy, holidays spent without a special someone, trips and photographs taken alone... And I’m wistful for a moment, because I want these things. I enjoy building a life with someone. Waking up together in the morning. Flirting, teasing, trusting. Loving and investing, with my whole heart. And then I remember...
2020 is not what I expected or planned for, and it's been uncomfortable and demoralizing in a lot of ways, but I take this approach: I take stock of all my blessings and accomplishments. Are you doing the same?
Christmas: whether one is single or in a couple, whether traveling to family or vice versa; typically, it’s a holiday one spends with loved ones. But this year, my Christmas looks a little different. And I love the flexibility and freedom.
When I’m asked the dreaded question: “How old are you?”, these thoughts ping-pong through my brain in an exhaustive sequence...
If never marry, so be it. Don’t feel sorry for me. My life has begun, and it's full of possibilities.
Rejection is a fact of life, and it’s happened over and over to all of us, including me.
I'm two months from my 34th birthday and I just realized I spent pretty much the entire length of my 30s stone-cold single.
I’m dreaming about the next time I see you. Of our eyes locking, our fingers brushing, of the moment when we realize that we feel the same way about each other, and that this is something worth pursuing. Or am I crazy? Did you feel it too?
At first, he did a lot of things right. Then he did a lot of things wrong; he made the mistake that so many guys make.
Time and time again, I run into idiot adult men who don’t know how to do a first date properly. So, I’m gonna get some hell for this one, but I don’t care… these are the rules for the first date.
As I look back on the last year, I feel fortunate to have adopted these three principles, now so wholly ingrained in my thinking that they might as well be a part of me.
Scary, at first, but once the floodgates were open, the POWER this revelation brought surged through me. This was me, my truth, my humble heart: "I'm not over you."
Over the past decade, I dived into dating apps in earnest, looking for the one — only to be disappointed and bored. I quit.